Transcript
Kristen Carder
Welcome to the I have ADHD podcast, where it’s all about education, encouragement and coaching for adults. With ADHD, I’m your host, Kristen Carter and I have ADHD, let’s chat about the frustrations, humor and challenges of adulting, relationships, working and achieving with this neurodevelopmental disorder, I’ll help you understand your unique brain, unlock your potential and move from point A to point B.
Hello, my friends. You are listening to Episode 12 of the I have ADHD podcast. My name is Kristen Carter and I am medicated, I am caffeinated and I am ready to roll. I am so excited to be here with you today. My day got off on a very rocky, rocky start. My husband and I both forgot to set alarms, and so this morning, we were jolted out of sleep by our youngest son. His name is Crosby, and he is five, and he woke us up at 754 that is so late we leave at 830 to take our kids to school, and it was just crazy Ness. About 10 minutes after I woke up, I was still in this like stupor of trying to find my whereabouts. I was just, like, so confused and like, I was just so crazy. I thankfully opened my Google Calendar and saw that I had a meeting at 930 that I had not prepared for. I was hoping to onboard a family into my day job company, and I wasn’t ready for it, and so we were just scrambling. I cannot believe this, but I just I put my big girl pants on, I kept my nose down, and I just really worked hard, and I got everything done for my meeting, and it went great. It went really, really well. We can do the hard things guys, we really can, if we don’t melt down with anxiety at the first sign of failure, which I, you know, opened that app, saw that I was totally unprepared for this meeting that was in an hour and a half I was still in my bathrobe. Yes, I wear a bathrobe.
Do you wear a bathrobe? I don’t know if that’s normal or not, but I love my cozy bathrobe. So I’m in my bathrobe. I see that I have this meeting in an hour and a half that I’m not at all prepared for. And I had options, right? I could totally freak out, meltdown, go through my cycle of self loathing and blame and self destruction and shame, but I chose not to do that, guys, I’m really growing up. I feel like I’m growing up at the same time. I want you to know that I’m in it to win it like I am still in this. I am definitely high functioning. I’ve learned a lot over the last 20 years, but holy cow, I still really struggle with this. So today was one of those days. Luckily, it all got done, and it all worked out really well. So yay, yay, yay, yay. Now listen, I want to encourage you to subscribe to the podcast, because I know you with ADHD. I know that your memory is not that great. No offense. Don’t get mad at me, but that’s just a hallmark trait of those of us with ADHD, right? Our memory sucks. So if you subscribe to the podcast. Guess what? You don’t have to remember to go and find it. It’s just going to magically appear in your podcast feed, and then you’ll remember to listen, okay? And since I want to be best friends with you, it’s really, really important to me that you remember to listen. Okay, so today we’re going to talk about relationships. This is the first in a series. I’m not sure if we’re gonna do two or three. We’ll just kind of see how it goes. But I’m on Instagram as I have ADHD podcasts, and I wanted to reach out to my instafam to see you know what kind of topics they wanted me to discuss on the podcast.
And what kept coming up over and over was relationships. Everybody wanted to hear about relationships, and so that’s what we’re going to do today. Today we are going to start with six steps to healthy relationships. And I’m a little scared. It’s a huge task, you guys, I’m totally out of my league. Please remember that I’m not a doctor or a therapist or a psychologist. I’m just a chick with ADHD, okay, and I figured some things out, but to take on this topic of relationships, that’s like, so important, and it’s affecting everyone, like poor relationships affects so many. Of us with ADHD. It’s definitely daunting, but we’re gonna go for it. Okay, we’re gonna go for it. So it’s gonna take a couple episodes, two or three, especially since I want to do a whole episode on conflicts, because I think that would be amazing. But first, I want to read the review of the week. This review comes from Sam on Orcas Island, and Sam says Kristen takes a disorder which cripples millions very seriously, but manages to be extremely funny at the same time. Thank you, Sam, that’s so sweet. I am glad I found this podcast and I’m now all caught up. There’s loads of inspiration with many aha moments. Okay, thank you, Sam, that was so kind you guys. Your ratings and reviews and DMS on Instagram, they mean so much to me. Podcasting is so weird. I’ve said this before, but it’s just a very strange thing. I’m very new at it. This is my 12th episode. I’m not an expert, and it’s not the kind of thing that you get immediate feedback for. It’s not like posting on Facebook or Instagram and then people interact with you.
You just kind of like, throw it out there to the world and hope that people like it. It’s really, really, really scary, and so to hear from you is totally making my day. So thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I love it. I love it. So if you would take a minute to rate this podcast, review it, if you’re on Spotify, that’s awesome. Shout out to my Spotify listeners. Just go ahead and take a screenshot and share it in your social so that other people can see that this podcast exists. Like I said, I’m a nobody, so we got to spread the word. You know what I’m saying? Okay, so we’re talking about relationships. We are talking about relationships, and I know that you guys all want feedback on how to interact with other humans. But the first thing that we need to do, the first thing that we have to step back and consider is, how are we in relationship with ourselves? Now, I’m a person of faith. I’m a devout Christian, so I believe the most important relationship that you can have is a relationship with God. However, this is not a spiritual podcast, right? So I’m not going to talk about spiritual things here. So the most important relationship that you can have right now is the relationship that you have with yourself. Okay, now, dudes, don’t shut me off. Okay, I know if you’re a man and you’re listening to this, you just rolled your eyes hardcore, and you totally checked out, but come back to me. Come on, come on back. This matters. You might not think it matters, but I’m sorry you’re wrong, like you’re 100% wrong. So please don’t turn this podcast off. Think about the relationships in your life. Are you happy with them? Is your spouse or your family or your friends? Are they super happy and feeling fulfilled by your relationship with them? This episode is for you.
Okay, so stick with me. Now, instead of starting with the tips and tricks of how to interact with other people, we can’t start there. We need to start with establishing a solid relationship with ourselves. We need to know who we are. Those of us with ADHD are really terrible at self reflection. Okay, that’s a documented scientific fact. We don’t take the time to think through who we are, why we act the way we act, what we need, what we want. Most of us don’t really understand why we show up in the world the way that we do. We just kind of go through our lives reacting impulsively to whatever is right in front of us, right? So this is a problem on so many levels, and I’m telling you that it’s really detrimental to all of our relationships now, because I want to take this really seriously, I actually created a download for you that is just going to walk you through some simple questions about who you are, why you act, the way you act, why you show up in the world, the way that you do, and some other questions about your priorities, so that You can kind of have that right in front of you, like I said, we’re not great at self reflection, and so what happens is that we don’t take the time and energy to observe ourselves.
We just end up reacting impulsively instead of intentionally, and so if you are a person that is wanting to live with a little bit more vision and understand yourself so that you can understand your relationships a little bit better, I mean, the printable is very basic. It’s not fancy, but I think it’s really, really helpful. So you can go to, I have ADHD dot. Com slash me, like me, you know yourself. So I have adhd.com/me and you can download a printable. It just has some very specific questions. And actually, if you want to go through it as you’re listening to this podcast episode, I do think that that would be really helpful. So step number one to healthy relationships is knowing yourself, observing yourself. Are you an introvert? Are you an extrovert? Do you enjoy conflict or do you avoid it?
What kinds of activities do you enjoy? What kinds of things do you not enjoy? I mean, I know these are seemingly basic things, but I think a lot of us kind of bounce or float through life without any sort of vision of who we are, how we enjoy interacting with people, and how we show up in the world. Okay, these are important things to observe about ourselves. So the next step in having healthy relationships is creating a top 10 list now, depending on who you are and what phase of life you’re in, you’re probably surrounded by anywhere between five and 50 people in your life on a daily basis. Now, some of you are lonely and you wish you had more people in your life. Others of you feel really overwhelmed by relationships and wish you could kind of clear the clutter.
Okay, but I’m going to guess that most of us are surrounded by five to 50 people on a daily basis, and most of these people need or want things from us, right? So here’s a question for you, who are the top 10 most important people in your life who are the top 10, if you had to make a list of 10 people in your life who are the top 10 people that you find to be really wonderful people that you want to invest your time and effort and energy in now it’s really hard for us to put things in ranked order, anything, it’s hard for us to rank anything. We suck at prioritizing. This is because for those of us with ADHD, everything feels like the same level of importance. Okay, our brains do not naturally rank things in order of importance. This is why you can find us washing dishes in our bathrobe five minutes before we’re supposed to leave the house for an important meeting. Okay, we just cannot prioritize the way that typical brains do. Everything that tugs at our attention feels like we need to classify it as important, but that the truth of the matter is that if we’re going to be successful at relationships, we need to put our people, you know, the relationships in our lives, we need to put them in order of priority. How do the people in your life rank in order of importance? If everyone wants something from you, who are the people that you feel should get your time and energy and effort and attention. Now, this is a huge problem that I used to struggle with, because I am a very outgoing person, and I used to be extremely extroverted until I had kids. And you know what? Thinking back, I’m not sure if I was super extroverted or if I was just constantly looking for stimulation and dopamine hits, you know. But in any case, I used to really spread myself very thin when it came to relationships. The problem with this is that the people that I actually cared the most about often ended up feeling neglected, and that was never my intention. But by giving everyone the same amount of attention, I didn’t give my priority people the right amount of attention, and so they no longer became priorities, and the relationships that I actually wanted to cultivate and keep suffered.
So I wonder if this is happening in your life. Is your family feeling neglected because you keep helping your buddies with their house projects on the weekends? Is your husband feeling neglected because you keep racing off to help your friend with her family crisis? How do you even determine who the most important people in your life are? How do you determine who should get your time and effort and energy? Now, remember that free download at I have adhd.com/me is going to help you put things in priority order. Now some of you may be really squeamish about ranking people, and I know, I know it sounds terrible. I’m not trying to stir up memories of middle school. Middle school was horrible for me. I seriously got kicked out of the lunch table in seventh grade. Okay, so we do not want to go back to middle school, but I have to tell you that everyone has a list of priorities. The. Problem is that those of us with ADHD do not keep things in our brains very well, and so instead of holding our priority list in our brain, we need to put it down on paper. Okay, who are the top people in your life who deserve your time and attention and energy, not everyone in your life carries equal weight of importance. Just because 20 people want something from you does not mean that they are entitled to get it from you. If you’re going to be good at relationships, you need to focus on the relationships that you want to cultivate. This is why you need to know yourself before we can even talk about relationships with other humans, because you need to know who you are, what you like, what you don’t like, what drains you, who’s really fun to be around, and who you want to focus on, who is a good friend that you want to invest in. If you have a spouse or a partner, they should probably be at the top of the list. If you have kids, they should be at least on the list. For me, my husband is my number one priority, and this means that no matter what’s going on in my day, no matter who needs me or what is being asked of me, if my husband texts, I respond to him, If I have zero energy for anyone and I want to just hide in a black hole with a glass of wine and a bag of Doritos, I still leave room for my husband. I’m not going to avoid him. I know that seems Elementary, but I think it needs to be said. I have created a list of priority, and he is number one on that list. And so when things come up, I weigh the things against my list of priorities. Now I have three kids, and the thing with kids is that they will take and take and take and take and take and take.
They will never stop taking. Their appetites for attention and love are never satisfied, and this can be so draining. So even though, yes, they’re on my list of priorities, I also really create, well, I tried to create healthy boundaries with them, because if I don’t, I will literally have nothing left. I will be completely depleted by them, okay, but obviously they’re way up on my list of priorities. Obviously, Okay, so next up on my list are I have two sisters. So my two sisters that I’m very close to, they’re next on the list. And then I have four super close girlfriends who I’ve known for years and years. There’s a very balanced give and take relationship with each of them that has stood the test of time and conflict and tragedy. Okay, these friends give and take. They do not just take. And I want your people on your list to be people who give and take as well. That’s my list, my husband, my kids, my sisters and my four closest girlfriends. Now, obviously, I have more people in my life that I love and I care about. And if you’re listening to this podcast and you know me in real life, please don’t feel offense for hearing me say that I have a top 10. The truth is, you have a top 10 too. You’re just not saying it out loud, because you probably don’t need to say it out loud the way that I do. All right, I have ADHD. I’m not able to prioritize, just in my brain, it has to go on paper.
Now I have amazing parents and I have awesome in laws, but they’re adults. They have their own communities and their own friendships, and if they have a crisis, of course, they’re gonna move up in priority level, of course, of course. But in my day to day, I only have space for so much, and the list stands where it stands. Okay, so why am I talking about this? Before we can go on and talk about maintaining relationships with other people in other episodes, we’re gonna need to set our priorities. Okay, remember episode six, living with a vision. This applies to relationships too. Are you happy with the direction of your relationships? Are you happy with who you’re spending your time with? Are they helping you to be the person that you want to become? Are they making you a better person? Answering those questions is really going to help you to determine who you should focus your time and effort and energy on Okay, step three to maintaining healthy relationships. Here we go. You are not obligated to anyone. Now, I want to leave spouses and children out of this section, okay, because it gets too complicated with them. So let’s just take our spouse, spouses and our kids and like, put them in a bread box. I don’t think anybody has a bread box anymore, but go ahead and put them in the bread box and leave them there for a second. Okay, so other than your spouses or your kids, you are not obligated to be in relationship. Live with anyone.
Some of you believe that if someone wants something from you, you have to give it to them. Some of you believe that if someone feels that they need you, you are obligated to be there from for them. And I’m here to tell you that’s just not true. You’re obligated to very few people in your life. Of course, your spouse, they should be at the top of your list. Of course, your children, who are dependent on you, like little kids, okay, maybe your boss, but there should be serious, healthy limits on that. So other than your spouse, your children and your boss, okay, you’re not obligated to anyone now. Hear me on this. Many of you are living your lives tied to people that you don’t actually want to be tied to out of a feeling of unnecessary duty or obligation, and this takes your time and effort and energy away from the people that you actually want to be in close relationship with. Remember, you only have so much effort and energy to go around. All right.
Time is not a renewable resource. It runs out. So spend your time on people that you want to spend your time on. Do not allow yourself to show up as someone who is fulfilling obligations that they don’t want to fulfill. That’s a yucky place to be. Okay. Number four, and this is a big one for those of us with ADHD don’t get wrapped up in other people’s crises. Okay, because we are so depleted of dopamine, sometimes I think we go out looking for other people’s problems to get involved in, just so that we have something to do, just so that we can feel good about ourselves, just so that we can feel like a hero. Okay, in the last two years especially, I’ve stepped back and observed that my version of loving others has been a sense of duty and obligation to people that I really should not be fixing stuff for. Like it’s not my job to fix stuff, right? I think we really struggle with this. We’re impulsive. We’re controlled by the now, so when someone anyone has a crisis, we want to jump into action and be there for them. It can be a major dopamine rush. But the problem comes when the person in crisis is not actually someone who’s a priority, right? They’re not on our priority list. They’re not on our top 10. And then those people who are on our list, those people who are really important in our lives, they get neglected. Remember, there’s only so much time and effort and energy to go around. Now, of course, this is going to happen once in a while, from time to time, like once a year, okay, but if you’re noticing that you’re getting involved in other people’s crisis, once a week, once a month, that is way too much, my friend. Okay, way too much. Now I’m going to give you an example of this playing out my own life, a woman that I know, who I really like, I really enjoy her. She began to go through a tough time with her husband and her kids, and I’ve been friendly with her for a couple years. She’s awesome. I enjoy her. She’s not on my top 10 list, okay, she’s not even on my top 20 list of important relationships, but she’s going through this crisis, and she reaches out to me, and obviously I want to help. I’m happy to help. So I meet for her. I meet her for coffee. It was great. I’m glad I did it. But then coffee turned into texting constantly, which I answered the text immediately, so I allowed it to happen, right? And phone calls and meeting up again, and soon I realized that she really wasn’t even taking my advice right, like and I couldn’t tell if she was telling me the tree truth or not. So I was really not sure of whether or not I was even being helpful to her situation. I was basically a sounding board, a place for her to hand over her problems.
But what was happening is that I was being really burdened by her problems. It was becoming obvious that I’d gotten myself into a situation where I was allowing myself to be drained over and over and over. I was texting her back immediately all the time I was thinking about the situation. I was feeling really heavy. I was feeling the weight of it. I don’t know if you can relate to that, but it was not a fun place to be. I didn’t even realize I was doing it. I didn’t notice it happening because I suck at self reflection. I suck at observing my circumstances and what I’m doing and what’s going on. I bet a lot of you don’t realize when you’re doing this, either, but I finally sat back and thought, oh my gosh, this is like so draining and overwhelming, and I don’t even see this relationship going anywhere. I don’t feel like I’m helping her. She’s not really a friend, like someone that I would ever confide in or trust. So here. What I did, I decided to remind myself that this wasn’t my crisis. Just because she’s going through something doesn’t make it my crisis. I can feel bad for her, I can pray for her, I can try to be helpful, but that’s about it, right? Like I don’t need to solve this problem for her. So every time she texted, I would just repeat that to myself, This is not my crisis. I began to set boundaries for reading and responding to our texts. If it was after five and I was with my family, I would just wait till the next morning, and I began to create space. It doesn’t mean that I’m a terrible person. It doesn’t mean that I don’t care, but it does mean that I understand my place in her life. Okay, I am not the problem solver. That’s not my job. It’s not my role. So I began to save my emotional energy and my time for the people that were on my priority list, my husband, my kids, my sisters and my besties, all right? This was a really powerful exercise for me, and it really taught me a lot about myself. It really kind of opened my eyes to how I’ve been showing up for other people as the hero, like trying to get in there and save them from their circumstances. That’s not my job. That’s not my job at all. Like, that’s kind of icky when I realized that, like, how prideful of me, you know, but whatever we all have our flaws, so everyone wants to feel needed, and that’s what I was experiencing. Helping people in crisis can often give us that dopamine high of being helpful and heroic. But the problem is that on the other side of that is being totally drained and depleted and empty, with nothing left for those who are most important for us, nothing left for those who are actually giving to us as well. I wonder how many of you are getting involved in other people’s crises just because of the excitement it brings. I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that for men with ADHD, it’s really hard to be at home when there’s not much going on, and I know it is for me, so if a buddy calls with a broken car or a leaky roof, you probably jump at the chance to get up and get out the door and help, because it takes you away from the mundane of your life.
You get to avoid the things that are boring or hard at home or maybe your boss calls with a request, and you jump at the chance to help. This isn’t necessarily wrong, as long as it’s not constantly at the expense of other people who are actually on your top 10 priority list, right? Okay, here comes Step Five in maintaining healthy relationships. Number five, you teach people how to treat you. This is so powerful. I learned it from Dr Phil like so long ago. Thank you, Dr Phil. I appreciate that helpful tidbit. You teach people how to treat you. It’s so important for all of us to understand this. All right, don’t get mad at me, friends. Okay, this may come across as harsh, but I want you to really understand it. I want you to feel it in your bones. We are responsible for the way that people treat us, talk to us and interact with us. What I mean by this is, if people are constantly rude to you, it’s because you’ve allowed it. If people are constantly draining you, it’s because you’re letting them if you feel like a relationship is one sided consistently, it’s because you haven’t chosen to change that you get to decide how you want to be treated. You’re in charge of you. Do you see why we have to start here when we talk about relationships, the hacks and the tips of interacting with other people will come but the fundamental stuff has to be first. If you’re feeling drained and depleted and pulled in a million different directions with people who you’re feeling obligated to, the most important people in your life are probably feeling neglected, and that’s in your control to change. It’s on you. No one’s making you say yes to them. It might feel like they’re making you say yes, because they’re showing dissatisfaction if you were to say no, but really, no one’s making you say yes. No one’s forcing you to text back. No one’s actually making you help them.
This is where knowing who you are and what you need really comes into play. Who are you What do you want, what do you like, what do you need, what do you want to focus on? What are your priorities? What are the top questions? Sins that need to be considered as you go about your day to day relationships. Of course, you’re going to give and serve and sacrifice for the people that you love, but a lot of us are giving and serving and sacrificing for people that we don’t love, just because we feel obligated to do it, just because there’s a crisis that’s coming up, just for the dopamine rush, or because we get a text notification or a phone call, you have the privilege of teaching people how to treat you.
You get to decide how much time you want to give to people. You get to decide what your priorities are and who your priorities are. You decide what relationships you’re going to invest your time and emotion into and what relationships you’re going to let die, because not every relationship has to continue. Now I’m not talking about marriages or kids here, okay, but when you think of your friends and extended family and your coworkers, are your priorities out of whack. Are you teaching the people in your life how you want to be treated with kindness and respect and not being guilted or obligated into things. If not, it’s time to rethink that, which brings me to my next point. Point number six, guess what? You’re allowed to say, no. This is so fundamental to all relationships. Your relationship with yourself, knowing yourself and what you need and what you want and what you enjoy and what your priorities are, is so important because based on those things, you’re allowed to say no to other things, you’re allowed to say no to other humans, especially if they’re not on your top 10, but you’re not going to know when to say no if you don’t know who you are, right? So that’s where we need to start. Who are you? What do you need? What do you like? What do you want?
And then, based on all of that, you’re gonna have the amazing privilege of saying no, dun, dun, dun, dun. I say no all the time. It is my favorite. I say it nicely and kindly, and I try to include like, 10 compliments in there with my No, but I definitely say no a lot. I think that I’ve really developed some introverted tendencies in the last 10 years. I believe it’s because I have three children, and I’m always being like, asked for things and touched and needed, and so really, I just don’t have a lot more to give. And so I’m finding in my life that I don’t have as much emotional capacity for people and for parties and events and all those things. And so I’ve really decided to protect myself in this way, and I say no a lot, if you’re not in my top 10 and you want to hang out, no matter how much I like you and enjoy you and think you’re awesome, we’re going to be planning out weeks in advance, and I’m making sure that it doesn’t take me away from my priority list. Okay, saying no is amazing. I invite you to practice it. I think today, as you go about your business, you should try to say no 10 times. Just Say No, say no. It is amazing. First, you have to know yourself. Then you have to set your top 10 list. What do you want? Who are you? Who are your priorities? And then, based on those things, dude, say no, it’s awesome. Okay? And lastly, this comes right after saying no, because it’s really important, not everyone’s going to be happy with you all the time. I’m so sorry to be the one to tell you this, but it is the truth. If you’re showing up as your authentic self, as the true version of who you really are, if you’re not pretending to like things that you don’t like, if you’re not pretending to like people that you don’t like if you’re not saying yes to things that you really wish you were saying no to. I have news for you. People are going to be mad. They’re going to be annoyed. One thing that we have to get comfortable with as adults is that people are not always going to be happy with us. Now I know a lot of you really struggle with rejection sensitivity, but I kind of want to flip that around, like you are allowed to be the one doing the rejecting saying no, that’s not a priority for me, and I am choosing not to do that. Now, when you do say no, people might have feelings about that they might not be happy, that’s okay. We’re not in charge of making other people happy. It’s not our job. It’s not even possible. We can’t make anyone happy.
Happiness is something that comes from inside of each individual. So if you say no to someone, of course, they’re not going. To be happy about it, right? But that doesn’t mean that we have to say yes, just so that we can control how people think and feel about us. Listen, you are a grown adult. You do not have to do anything to be valuable. You are valuable the way you are. You don’t have to perform, achieve, or do anything for anyone in order to have value and worth. Okay? So don’t say yes to things just to make other people happy. Say yes to things because they fall in line with the vision of who you want to be. Say Yes to people because they fall in line with the vision of your relationships and who you want to surround yourself with. As you begin to curate your top 10 list and teach people how to treat you and say, No, people are not going to be happy, right? If someone is used to having unlimited access to you, and you begin to create space and distance. They might have a negative response to that. If someone is used to you always saying yes to them, and you begin to tell them no, they might have a negative response to that. But your job is not to control people’s responses. Your job is to control yourself. Your job is to manage your own thoughts, and what I want to invite you to do is have a vision for your life and have a vision for your relationships. Have a vision for who you are and who you show up as in your relationships. Be your authentic self. Do not pretend to like things that you don’t like. Do not pretend to like people that you don’t like. Okay, I’m not saying be mean. That’s not what I’m saying. But I’m saying don’t spend your precious, precious, precious time, energy, effort, resources, on things that you don’t even really care that much about. Okay, don’t go back to saying yes and being available at all times. Manage your own thinking, remember who you are, what you like, what you need, and remember the people on your top priority list. So to review, in order to have healthy relationships, you need to know yourself. You need to make a top 10 List of people in your life. And listen, if you’re an introvert, maybe your list is a top five list, and that’s fine.
However many people you think you can really invest in. That’s how many people go on your list. But I encourage you not to make it longer than 10. Do not fix other people’s problems. You teach people how to treat you. Feel free to say no. And lastly, not everyone’s gonna be happy with you all the time. If everyone is happy with you all the time, you’re kind of doing it wrong, like that’s just not what it’s like to be human. If you’re being true and authentic and real, not everyone’s going to be happy, and that’s okay. It’s Okay Be kind, be sweet, but do not back down on your priorities and your list of people who you really, truly want to invest your time and effort and energy into I am so glad that you stuck with me through this episode. I feel like it was kind of a monster of an episode, so I really hope you enjoyed it. Remember, I have that free resource for you at I have adhd.com/me and I cannot wait to talk to you next week. My friend. Bye. Hey, if you enjoyed listening to this podcast, would you do me a huge favor and rate it, review it and share it on your social media. There are at least 16 million adults in America with ADHD and many, many more worldwide. And I’m a nobody, I don’t know how to reach these people without your help. So do you want to help me change the world? Rate review and share this podcast so that more adults with ADHD get the resources and help and support that they need. Thank you so much. You.
