Episode #434: Why You Keep Breaking Your Own Rules

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Kristen Carder

About This Episode

What if the reason you keep breaking your own boundaries isn’t a lack of discipline?

In this episode, Kristen dives into Part 2 of the conversation on internal boundaries: the rules and limits we set for ourselves to protect the life we actually want.

For many adults with ADHD, boundaries can trigger instant resistance. If rules, expectations, or authority were used to control, shame, or coerce you growing up, even your own reasonable limits can provoke an internal response of, “You’re not the boss of me.”

Kristen explores how to shift from self-control to self-collaboration. You’ll learn why “should” boundaries rarely work, how perfectionism destroys self-trust, and what to do when you inevitably break a boundary.

Instead of spiraling into guilt and shame, Kristen teaches you how to repair with yourself, get curious about what support was missing, and begin again.

Because internal boundaries aren’t about restriction.

They’re about protection.

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Learning About My Brain...

Changed Everything

Hi, I’m Kristen Carder—ADHD expert, podcast host, and certified coach who’s been exactly where you are. Diagnosed at 21, I spent years cycling through planners, courses, and systems that never quite worked. Everything changed when I discovered the power of understanding my ADHD brain and the transformative impact of community support.

Now, after 15+ years of research and experience, I’ve helped thousands of adults with ADHD thrive. I’m here to show you how understanding your brain can transform your life, just like it did for mine.

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